The tradition of handfasting has deep and extended roots within the Celtic cultures; there's quite a bit of history to be told. Of course, I won't be the one to tell you this story for there are others out there far better suited to the task. When I did my own research on handfasting, I found variations with the tradition - some say handfasting was a marriage, some say it was a substitution for a marriage; some say it was performed by a priest or officiant, others say it was performed when no officiant was avaialble; some say the effects of the bond lasted only a year and a day, others say t'was for a lifetime. There's alot of information out there for you to peruse, so I'll leave that task to you and simply present you with what I feel is current to the topic.

If you've read my Ritual of Dedication and it's forward, you know I went on about how important that particular ritual is and that is something that should not be taken lightly. Well, a handfasting ritual is no less of an undertaking, in my mind. I know there are plenty of people out there who use the concept of handfasting and it's (supposed) year and a day duration to escape making a REAL commitment. They do this out of fear (of commitment) or out of convenience or for whatever reasons, but, in my mind, they are selling themselves short. It is my own opinion that a handfasting should be approached with the same level of intent and certainty that a more traditional wedding/marriage would be approached. In my mind, there really is little difference (between the two). I believe, these days, handfasting is a technical term that merely differenciates the type of ceremony (ritual) being performed from the more (modern) traditional wedding ceremony. You say "Handfasting" and I hear "Pagan Wedding."

With that in mind, I now present to you a Handfasting Ritual (read Pagan Wedding) that I wrote and performed earlier this year. This ritual has a couple of key elements to it that helped shape it. First of all, the Bride and Groom wanted a full Wiccan ritual. Not being Wiccan myself, I did have a bit of research to do, and for that, I thank the Lady Ardane and many others who have put there information up on the web. Most of what you see here came from some basic outlines I found at various places on the web. (Of course I can't refer you to those sources - my bookmarks have long since been cleaned out - but I can tell you simply to do a search on "handfasting" and you will come up with plenty of places to turn.) As usual, I took the outlines and some of the phrasing and re-wrote what didn't fit or what I felt needed to be changed. Some bits remained the same, some we altered, others were deleted, and new elements were added. (Isn't this what every good Witch does?)

The second key element that shaped the ritual was the fact that the Bride was the mother of two children (age 6 and 7, I beleive). It was important to both the Bride and Groom that the children be included in the ritual, not in the (modern) traditional roles of flower girl and ring bearer, but in key roles of offering and acceptance. The Groom felt that he was not only being wed to his Bride, but that he was also marrying the children, assuming the role of Father for them and becoming a key player in their lives. We all felt that by incorporating the children, they would feel as important as their mother, especially since they were asked the same questions as the Bride (in terms of "Is this what YOU want?")

As always, take what you need from here, discard what you find frivolous or unuseful, and do what you will. Just please, before taking that step toward handfasting (or marriage, of any sort), be clear about your intentions, to yourself and to your mate. I want everyone to live long happy lives TOGETHER.

May Blessings Abound!
Lady Brighid

HPs' broom, HPs' staff, HPs' athame, Quarter candles, matches, incense, Fire (South) candle, pitcher (filled with water) & cup set, herb offering, Spirit candle, God/dess candles, Bride & Groom tapers, Unity candle, rings, HPs' wand, necklaces, children's tapers, Family candle, chalice (filled with juice or wine), candle snuffer.

This is done in solitary fashion by the High Priestess (HPs) and her Shadow while the wedding party prepares and the guests gather in the warmth of the lodge. Quarter candles and offerings are placed at the Quarters and the altar is set. When these tasks have been completed, the HPs cuts a doorway in the circle with her staff through which the guests and participants will proceed. (If the HPs must leave the circle, she is to close and seal the doorway from the outside and reopen it upon her return.) The HPs then places her staff across the threshold and her broom across the top of the doorway.

The guests leave the lodge and proceed to the circle led by the Bridesmaid (BM) and brought up by the Groomsman (GM). The HPs addresses the guests outside the circle.

HPs: There are two who would be joined together as one and so this sacred circle has been cast. The gate now stand open to the temple of love, honor, and respect. There is no challenge, for all who enter with joy and love for this sacred union are welcome here.

The BM is met at the doorway by the HPs and questioned upon crossing the threshold.

HPs: How do you enter the circle, my sister?
BM: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.
HPs: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust I welcome thee.

The two embrace and exchange blessings.

Both: Blessed Be!

The BM leads the procession sunwise around the circle until she has come full circle. (Hopefully, at this time, all the guests will be within and spaced evenly around the perimeter.) She stops just before she again reaches the doorway. As the procession is brought up by the GM, he is met at the doorway questioned upon crossing the threshold.

HPs: How do you enter the circle, my brother?
GM: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.
HPs: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust I welcome thee.

The two embrace and exchange blessings.

Both: Blessed Be!

The GM takes his place opposite the doorway from the BM.

Next, the children are summoned forth. They are met at the doorway by the HPs and questioned upon crossing the threshold.

HPs: How do you enter the circle, my children?
Both: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.
HPs: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust I welcome thee.

The HPs embraces the children and they exchange blessings.

All: Blessed Be!

The children moveto stand beside the BM & GM, respectively. Now the Groom is summoned forth. He also is met at the doorway by the HPs and questioned upon crossing the threshold.

HPs: How do you enter the circle, my brother?
Groom: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.
HPs: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust I welcome thee.

The two embrace and exchange blessings.

Both: Blessed Be!

The Groom takes his place between his GM and the son.

Finally, the Bride is summoned forth and is met at the doorway by the HPs and questioned upon crossing the threshold.

HPs: How do you enter the circle, my sister?
Bride: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.
HPs: In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust I welcome thee.

The two embrace and exchange blessings.

Both: Blessed Be!

The Bride takes her place between her BM and her daughter.

With the wedding party now fully present, the HPs takes up her staff and seals the doorway then leads them to stand center circle, HPs behind the altar, Bride and Groom a step before the altar, daughter and BM to the right, son and GM to the left.

HPs addresses the guests, turning as she speaks.

HPs: We are gathered here on this day to join together this man and this woman, and her children, in a ritual of love. Let all who stand within this circle be here of their own freewill in Perfect Love and Perfect Trust. Let all hearts join to charge this circle with pure and perfect love. May this sacred space be consecrated before the Goddess and God and may it be a Guardian and Protector for the work we do this day. So mote it be!

The HPs goes to the altar and exchanges her staff for her athame. Her Shadow goes to the East Gate and lights the candle of the East. All those inside the circle face the East and assume the invoking stance.

HPs: Watchtowers of the East,
Elementals of Air,
Guardians of free thought,
The inspirational breath of life,
We do summon, stir, and call upon you now
to witness this rite and guard this circle.

The Shadow lights the incense.

HPs: Be here with us, oh Spirits of Air,
with your whisper of love and your breath of life.
Join the bonds between these two;
with your nimble fingers, tie them tight.
All: Blessed Be!

HPs draws the invoking pentagram with her athame.

The HPs' Shadow goes to the South Gate and lights the candle of the South. All those inside the circle face the South and assume the invoking stance.

HPs: Watchtowers of the South,
Elementals of Fire,
Guardians of primal energy and will,
The creative force of life,
We do summon, stir, and call upon you now
to witness this rite and guard this circle.

The Shadow lights the Fire candle.

HPs: Be here with us, oh Spirits of Fire,
with your kiss of inspiration and desire.
Give their bond, their passion and love
your own all-consuming ardor.
All: Blessed Be!

HPs again draw the invoking pentagram.

The HPs' Shadow goes to the West Gate and lights the candle of the West. All those inside the circle face the West and assume the invoking stance.

HPs: Watchtowers of the West,
Elementals of Water,
Guardians of emotional realms,
The lucid dream of life,
We do summon, stir, and call upon you now
to witness this rite and guard this circle.

The Shadow pours the water offering.

HPs: Be here with us, oh Spirits of Water,
with your tender and fluid embrace.
Grant these two the deepest of love
and richness of body, soul, and spirit.
All: Blessed Be!

HPs draws the third invoking pentagram.

The HPs' Shadow goes to the North Gate and lights the candle of the North. All those inside the circle face the North and assume the invoking stance.

HPs: Watchtowers of the North,
Elementals of Earth,
Guardians of physical manifestations,
The foundation and sustenance of life,
We do summon, stir, and call upon you now
to witness this rite and guard this circle.

The Shadow adds the offering of herbs.

HPs: Be here with us, oh Spirits of Earth,
with your roots of love that grow deep.
Let your strength and consistency be theirs
throughout this union in this lifetime.
All: Blessed Be!

HPs draws the fourth invoking pentagram.

HPs returns her athame to its place on the altar and lights the Spirit candle. All face center circle.

HPs: As Above (reach arms upward),
So Below (reach arms downward),
Spirit unites the whole (cup hands together, outstretched from heart).
Spirit Without (reach arms outward),
Spirit Within (cross arms over chest),
Spirit never ends (draw a circle in front of you with fingertips starting at the top and meeting at the bottom).

HPs lights the Goddess and God candles then again assumes the invoking stance.

HPs: Gracious Goddess, beautiful Lady of the Moon,
Blessed God, mighty Lord of the Sun,
We call on you to join us in this circle,
to guide us in this work,
to bless these rites and this union.
Give to these before us your love and protection
from all that would try to harm their union.
Grant them harmony and beauty in their lives
and let them be ever-mindful of their commitment,
one to the others.
So mote it be!

HPs draws the fifth and final invoking pentagram then faces the wedding party and recites the Blessing Prayer.

HPs: In the name of The One,
which has ever been and shall ever be -
anima and animus,
chaos and thaos,
the first and last breaths of life...
In the name of The One
which is within us all -
all-knowing,
all-powerful,
ever-present,
boundless,
eternal...
In the names of the Lady of the Moon and the Lord of the Sun...
In the names of the mighty ones of the Four Quarters,
the Kings and Queens of the elements...
In the name of Love...
Blessed be this time,
which is not a time,
and this place,
which is not a place,
and we,
your children,
who dwell within
as well as without.
All: Blessed Be!

HPs: Let (Bride's name) and (Grooms' name) stand here before the altar in the presence of the Ancient Ones.

The Bride & Groom step forward to the altar.

HPs to Bride: (Bride's name), do you come here of your own freewill?
Bride to HPs: I do.
HPs: And is it your wish to become one with this man in the bond of marriage?
Bride: It is.

HPs to Groom: (Grooms' name), do you come here of your own freewill?
Groom to HPs: I do.
HPs: And is it your wish to become one with this woman in the bond of marriage?
Groom: It is.

The HPs addresses the children.

HPs to Children: (Children's names), do you come here of your own freewill?
Children to HPs: I do.
HPs: And is it your wish for your mother to become one with this man in the bond of marriage?
Children: It is.

The Bride & Groom each take up their taper candle from the altar and light from the respective God/dess candles.

HPs: In the endless dark of the unborn world, there came two flames becoming one fire. Let their flames burn in your hearts and bring light and warmth to the night of your soul.

The Bride & Groom join their flames to light the Unity Candle then replace their tapers on the altar.

The BM and GM read selections that have been chosen for the ceremony by the Bride and Groom.

HPs: Do you bring tokens of your love that are symbolic of your union?

GM presents the Groom's ring for the Bride to the HPs.

GM: I have been charged with the keep of this ring, symbolic of the Circle of Life and a token of (Grooms' name)'s love for (Bride's name).

BM presents the Bride's ring for the Groom to the HPs.

BM: I have been charged with the keep of this ring, symbolic of the Circle of Life and a token of (Bride's name)'s love for (Groom's name).

The HPs takes up the wand and slides the rings on it. HPs holds the wand by both ends and the Bride & Groom each place their right hand over the rings (his hand over hers).

HPs: Above you, the stars.
Below you, the stones.
As time does pass, remember...
Like a star, your love should be constant.
Like a stone, your love should be firm.
Be close, yet not so close that you restrict one another.
Possess one another, yet grant each other freedom to grow.
Be understanding and compassionate.
Have patience with each other, for though storms may come, quickly they shall pass.
Be free in giving warmth and affection;
make love often and with each other be sensuous.
Fear not, lest the ways and words of the unenlightened give you dis-ease,
for Goddess and God are with you now
and present they shall ever be.

The Groom takes the Bride's left hand in both if his.

Groom to Bride: (vows he has written)

The HPs removes the one ring from the wand and hands it to the Groom. The Groom places this ring on the Bride's finger.

Groom to Bride: Let this Circle of Gold reflect the Circle in which we stand to be a constant reminder of my pledge to you. Let it remind you daily of the wheel of life and the unbroken cycles of eternity.

The Bride takes the Groom's left hand in both of hers.

Bride: (vows she has written)

The HPs removes the other ring from the wand and hands it to the Bride. The Bride places this ring on the Groom's finger.

Bride to Groom: Let this Circle of Gold reflect the Circle in which we stand to be a constant reminder of my pledge to you. Let it remind you daily of the wheel of life and the unbroken cycles of eternity.

HPs to Groom: (Groom's name), do you bring tokens of your love that are symbolic of your commitment to the children?

The Groom presents the children's necklaces to the HPs.

Groom: I bring these pendants of silver as a token of my love and a symbol of my commitment to (children's names).

The HPs summons the children to the altar where they will stand between the Bride and Groom. She wraps the necklaces around the wand, holds the wand by both ends, and the children and the Groom each place their right hand over the necklaces (children's hands side by side, Groom's hand over theirs).

HPs: By blood, the Circle of Family must not be made,
but by love and respect and commitment.
Indeed, the Circle of Family made by choice
can be stronger than that of blood.
As we honor each other and the choices we make,
we, in turn, honor ourselves.
When we honor ourselves,
we honor the Divine Spirit which lives within us all,
and in doing so, we honor Goddess and God.
Let mutual respect and love be the foundation of this family
by acknowledging the value of each other's choices.
Let this family be as One.
Sing together, laugh together,
cry together, and love together.
Let no secrets divide the Circle of Family.

The HPs removes the necklaces from the wand and hands them one by one to the Groom. The Groom places the children's necklaces around their necks.

Groom to Children: (Whatever he wishes to share with the children.)

The Bride & Groom again take up their respective candles. The children take their candles from the altar and light them from the Unity Candle. They all join their flames to light the Candle of Family (which will reside on the hearth of their home and burn anytime there is a family Circle or discussion), then return their individual candles to the altar.

HPs: It is by the union of (Bride's name) and (Groom's name) that this family is made. Let the Candle of Family burn brightly as the hearth which is the center of home.

The Groom removes his Witch's cord and presents it to the HPs. The Bride and Groom join hands and the HPs binds their wrists.

HPs: As we bind together this man and this woman with this cord, let their fates and future be so bound. May they hold fast to each other, even as they are now held fast. Thy hands are fasted, what was two is now one. The work of love and joy is complete, and yet, is just begun.

The HPs unwraps the cord and returns it to the Groom.

The HPs lifts the chalice from the altar.

HPs: With the Ancient Ones present as witness to this rite, I now proclaim you to be husband and wife. As you share the chalice this day, so may you share your lives and blessings. So Mote It Be!

The HPs presents the chalice to the Groom. The Bride and Groom kiss over the chalice then the Groom tips it to the Bride's lips. The Groom then offers the chalice to the Bride and she tips it to his lips. The Bride hands the chalice back to the HPs and she returns it to the altar.

The HPs' Shadow retrieves the broom from over the doorway and, with the HPs, holds it about a foot above ground (HPs holding the broom end). The Bride and Groom hold hands and jump the broom. The HPs then takes the broom and sweeps away the paths of their past.

HPs takes up her athame and assumes the invoking stance, turning widdershins as she speaks.

HPs: Mighty Ones of the Four Quarters,
The Kings and Queens of the Elements,
we dismiss you now and ask you to return
to your elemental homes
taking with you our love and gratitude for your attendance.
Go if you must,
stay if you will;
we bid you farewell.

The HPs' Shadow extinguishes the Quarter candles, starting in the North and moving widdershins as the HPs draws the banishing pentagram.

HPs: Dear Lady, Blessed Mother of us all,
Gracious Lord of the Woodland,
we thank you for your attendance in our sacred circle
and ask your blessings on this family
and on the work we have performed this day.
Return now to your areas of governance
and take with you our love and gratitude for your keep.
Go if you must,
stay if you will;
we bid you farewell.

The HPs' Shadow extinguishes the Diety candles as the HPs draws the banishing pentagram.

The HPs exchanges her athame for her staff.

HPs: In the name of Brighid,
the eternal Bride,
the eternal flame,
blessed be all those who have stood to witness this rite.
May your days be filled with love and laughter
and may your nights be filled with the passion of the soul.
Go ye now into the world
and carry with you the flame of your heart's fire.
May Blessings Abound!

The HPs uncasts the circle.

HPs: May the circle be open but unbroken;
may the peace of the Goddess be ever in your heart.
Merry meet and merry part and merry meet again.
So Mote It Be!